Rude

I don't think I'm one to get overly upset or to hold grudges when people don't "do the right thing". Yes, every now and then I get bent out of shape, but that's fairly rare (and mostly induced by my beloved family!). But this week I'm kinda irritated. I gave out almost 20 b-day invites to WA's daycare friends and only 3 people have responded. 3. And I asked for responses by this Friday. So unless I get an influx of RSVPs over the next two days, I'm considering OH Mommy and Daddies r-u-d-e!

Frat Boy

The other day WA's teacher pulled me aside to recount WA's day. I'm used to this, as we attempt to figure out his difficulties with the daycare environment chats like these have become commonplace. What I wasn't expecting was to hear about WA's two Jim Belushi-esq moves. During nap time, the pre-K room and WA's preschool room combine and "nap". This means that some kids sleep, some lay quietly and others, like my son, fidget. That day he took fidgeting to a whole new level. Apparently, in the middle of nap time, WA stood up and mooned the rest of the non-napping kids. After I cringed a bit, the teacher went on to tell me that she also found him attempting to stick his head in the toilet. What?? Fantastic. That night when I explained that we can't do those types of things and he told me "But Mommy, I was making a joke!" Oh man. I dare anyone to tell me that I do not have a future frat boy on my hands…

Differences

Bath time just became interesting. Last week, while bathing WA and IA, WA looked at her and said…"Mommy, where's IA's penis?". Whoa boy. This was the first time WA has directly shown an interest in anatomy and anything remotely circling the birds and bees. I wasn't exactly prepared (though I should have been considering my CT friend has blogged about her daughter's curiosity. LP is an intensely bright and inquisitive little girl, that should have tipped me off this was coming…). I explained to him that boys have different parts down there than girls. Luckily he was content with this explanation and didn't press for more details. He did however turn to me and say…"Well, Mommy. Boys have penises, they are ROCK STARS!" Why yes WA, little do you know just how right you are.

"Presents"

First of all...Happy Mother's Day to all the fabulous moms who frequent this blog!

Today I got a little star treatment (it being mom's day and all). It wasn't overboard, but just some nice solid appreciation. My favorite part of the whole experience was getting presents from JA and the kids. With the presentation of each gift, WA proudly announced what was in each package before handing it over (i think WA forgot he had told me upon returning home from shopping with his dad the day before). As any good mom would do, I acted surprised and thrilled. The thrill was legit...even if the surprise may not have been:).

Here is a pic that perfectly captures WA at the moment...on our way to the zoo today. Yes, the hockey attire was totally required.

My best friend

Today I had a bit of a heart breaker conversation with WA. We were riding in the car, just he and I, and out of the blue he said "Mommy, Jacob is my best friend.". Now, that's great, Jacob is a pretty rad kid, but they only problem is that Jacob lives in CT. He and WA were classmates at WA's old daycare. WA looooved him, possibly even idolized him a bit. I'm very glad that WA formed a friendship that was so meaningful to him, but the same sort of thing doesn't seem to be happening here in Ohio. We then went on to talk about Jacob and how he lives in CT and how we now live in OH. I asked who his best friend here is and he said "No one.". I said "No one?" "Not even Will or Owen?" (two of his new classmates). Once again he said "No.". "Mommy, I don't have a best friend here, no one likes me." Uff, and there went the dagger in to my heart.

His teacher says that he plays with all the kids at school and there's no real reason for concern (we'd chatted about how WA was doing and I asked if he was making friends). Still, it kind of sucks when you're kid essentially tells you he feels like a loser. My wish for him is that he keeps the memory of all his best CT friends alive (there were a few really great ones!) and also finds someone here that he connects with as well. I know he will, it's just that I worry. And guilt...there's a bit of that too.

Mario Leallman

WA is well on his way to mastering ice hockey.

He's come so incredibly far over the past year as the pictures below illustrate. He's got his street hockey slap shot down (now all we need to do is get that sucker to work on the ice) and he's learning the concept of passing/sharing the puck.  

                          Then

                           Now

Go WA!

My ladies man

From the day he was born, WA has been a ladies man. He's favored women above men in almost every circumstance. For 3.5 solid years of his life he's been a momma's (and grand-momma's) boy. Some of his favorite people were girls...from his best friends at daycare(MK, LD) to his babysitters (Ms. Natalie and Ms. Cherine...still sorely missed). He'd even interact more with a stranger if she was female and was just generally more at ease with the superior sex. The possible exception to this rule was my dad. My dad is a complete, but loving, spaz and his laid back approach to children really appealed to WA (fade to dream sequence....NA's Dad: You mean I actually have to WATCH the kid when I'm babysitting? NA: Yes Dad, or else he'll jump off the couch and bust his head open. NA's Dad: Oh.) Recently WA's female centric view of life has begun to change. His friends at school are almost all male and more and more he's asking for his Dad. "I want Daddy to put me to bed.," "Mom, where's Dad?", "Daaaaadeeeeee!" (when hurt). I love that my guys are bonding and my pediatrician did tell me to expect this as WA turned 4. But I also must admit that there is a small part of me that misses being his everything. I guess this is just practice for what's to come!

Say Ahhhhh

Last week WA got his tonsils and adenoids removed. He had what's called "kissing tonsils" which meant his were so big they actually touched in the back of his throat. You can imagine how difficult it was to eat and breath with those suckers. While in CT I had poked around with our pediatrician about the possibility of having them removed. Our Dr. tended to be on the less aggressive side (which usually I like) and suggested we wait it out until 7 years (when these needless lymphatic organs generally shrink by themselves). My mother's intuition was nagging and I kept feeling like this wasn't the right thing for WA (since he had apnea and often woke up exhausted). So once we moved to OH, I finally hooked up with a pediatrician who agreed and sent us to the ENT. Even though the recovery was not fun (what parent doesn't cringe at their child crying "Mommy, make it feel better...") I am convinced it was totally the right decision.

[We are lucky enough to now live in a town that has access to a premier children's hospital. I've frequented this hospital WAY too much over the past few months and each time I am even more impressed than the last. Each care taker has been awesome...from the doctors, to nurses, to the lady dropping off the food. Just amazing. It's definitely heartbreaking to be there at times. For example, across the hall from WA was a little boy who was recovering from brain surgery. He had his head shaved and a cut from front to back. His parents clearly had to work and often time he was left alone during the day (with the exception of the nurses). What an awful thing for both him and his parents. I just can't imagine. You also see so many kids (of all ages) who are clearly gravely ill. I am so thankful that, even though we've spent our fair share of hours at that hospital, my kids are relatively happy and healthy. Now that's a blessing.]

10 days later and WA is finally feeling better. His throat is still occasionally tender (like when he eats crackers), but all in all he took it like a champ. His voice is actually somewhat different, which we were told to expect, and he his pronunciation isn't as clear. He essentially has to learn how to talk and breath without huge lumps blocking the way. Kind of fascinating. Now all he has to do is come down off his week long ice cream/popsicle/pudding high and we'll be golden.

Everyone needs a vacation

Over the past month WA has been exhibiting dramatic "3 yr old little boy" behavior. For those of you blessed with only girls or pre-2 yr old boys, let me enlighten a bit...

A 3 yr old little boys love to:
1. jump
2. run
3. not listen
4. play "fight" or play "superheros"...which generally involves running, shoving, pushing or actual thumping others on the head, neck, back or chest
5. throw toys
6. do all of the above especially when told not to

As a result, we had been getting plenty of frown faces on his daily sheet. His teachers put either smileys or frowns to denote good or bad days. Actually a really smart idea because the kids can look and see, with a visual aid, if they had a good day or a bad one. While the behavior is generally worse at daycare, sometimes his listening ears do not exist at home either. These make for loooong weeks.

Since WA is blessed with a great set of (now local) grandparents, his grandmother offered to take him for a few days. I'm not sure if she was showing me mercy or if she truly missed WA! WA ended up spending two days in heaven. As I've blogged before, he gets completely spoiled when he is there (as he should!). This time he came back with a healthy appreciation for Frosted Flakes (or the Tiger cereal as he calls it). He even tried to con me in to a box, but I told him it was a special treat for Grandma's...and thankfully he bought it.

It reminds me of a story about my niece. When my Mom was alive, KF would go to visit my parents. My parent's special treat du jour was chocolate ice cream. KF would gorge and then go through withdrawal once home. On one occasion she woke up after returning and insisted "I WAAAANT ICEEEE CREEEEEEAM!". It was breakfast and my brother and sister-in-law had to talk her down from the ledge. Just goes to show you how great spoiling is for the grandparents and how not great it can be for the parents:).

So back to WA....after having spent a couple days at my in-laws he came back completely refreshed. Like a new kid. He was listening and being his sweet self. Had great days at school with plenty of smiley faces. This got me thinking...do we not give our kids enough credit? Maybe everyone just needs a little vacation now and then. Right?!?

Brighten your day

This past weekend I was wiped out by an ear infection. 10 days and 2 courses of antibiotics later and I still can't hear out of my left ear. Along with my half-deaf state is accompanying dizziness and nausea. Really a treat...especially after the winter we've had. So there I am on Sunday, feeling kinda crappy and playing with IA. WA and my hubby went out for a bit to give the house some relative peace and quiet. They came back late in the afternoon and WA burst through the door. "Mama! Mama! Where aaaaaare you???". I called back to tell him that I was in the playroom with IA. He came running straight at me with a huge smile on his face and a large white package. "Mama, Daddy and I got you theeeese!" Plop, right in my lap. (Ok, so he needs to work on his "smooth" delivery) I look down to find a sweet bouquet of my favorite flowers hand selected by WA from the farmers market. My boys got flowers to brighten my dizzy, nasty, deaf day. And it worked:).

"Sweaty"

This morning as WA, IA and I were imitating animals, I asked WA what he would name a dog. His answer? "Sweaty". Sweaty?? Yes, Sweaty. I'm really not sure what this says, or where it came from, but it gave me a nice laugh and made me wonder, even more, how that little brain of his works. I was expecting something more along the lines of "Barky" or "Waggy"...certainly not "Sweaty". I think we'll wait a bit to add a canine to the family 'till WA's naming skills mature.

I mean seriously....COME ON!

Last week IA was back in the ER after turning blue and this week WA spent Tuesday at home with me with a nasty case of pink eye. Heavens above, what the heck is going on here?!? This is about the ump-enth illness in our household in the past two months...let's not even count hospital stays, ERs, doctor's visits, x-rays and trips the the pharmacy! I have no idea what I did in a past life or if I'm being punished for the silly mistakes of my youth, but COME ON!!

Am and am not

Here are two things I am not...
1. artistic
and
2. skinny

I wish I were both, but I'm just not. Yes, I do consider myself creative (it's part of my job and I've been told I have an eye for color), but I'm not "artistic". Executing art projects, especially on snow or sick days, does not come as first nature to me. Both of my parents were (and are) great artists. My mom was a pretty good painter and even her handwriting was swooshie and clean, but not cutesy. Mine? Complete mush. I should have been a doctor. My Dad is also a great artist. For some reason these genes skipped my generation (my brother also being a complete fail at art of any kind). I am secretly hoping that one of my kids will repose these long lost genes and paint me a pretty picture one day. Until then, we have the art easel up and the paints out. I can't say I'm a great mentor, but I do love watching WA and IA paint their hearts out.

I've also never been a small woman.At my skinniest, I was still solid. Now, I'm just fat. Two kids, a mother's death, a major life move. Yes, it's all gotten the best of me. Some days I just don't have the energy to care and others I get crippling blues as a result, and still some I am motivated for change. My friend Sarah and I are going to attempt a half marathon next year, so I am hoping to regain some semblance of fitness, even if it doesn't mean I'm "skinny". It's going to be a very looooong road, but it's something I've been wanting to do for a while. Fitting this in to my schedule will be a serious challenge and one I hope I can rise to. Wish us luck!

Here are two things I am...
1. appreciative
and
2. a good Mom

Even at my bluest (and admittedly there has been a lot of that recently), I am still so, so thankful for what I have, what I've been given and what I have accomplished. Some days I embody this better than others, but it's always there. I think sometimes that feeling of gratitude is the only thing that gets me through. And yes, I am thankful for that too!

At my worst, I'm a good Mom. I had an amazing example and one that I am constantly striving to live up to. My son, WA, can be a challenge. He is a will-full, stubborn kid. Combine that with the age of 3 and I often have a kid that pushes me to the brink. Finding the right parenting balance with him has been hard. I don't always hit that balance, but I try my hardest. His loving, listening, cooperative days can't be beat...and these are definitely what gets me through the not-so-great days. I often find myself jealous of Moms that walk around with well mannered mellow kids in tow. Not that mine is a complete horror show, but he's just active and has a mind of his own. I am constantly changing my techniques to fit the situation, and most times it works. Other times it does not. I wish there were more of a manual or support group, because I feel very isolated sometimes when attempting to figure out best approaches, random behaviors, personality vs. environment. It's a lot to try and weed out. Though I don't rise to the challenge perfectly every time, I think I do a pretty good job. I'm a good Mom.

I guess I am and am not a lot of things. That makes me, me. Sometimes I struggle, sometimes I thrive. Welcome to life Mrs. A!

Look Mom, no hands!

This weekend WA skated ALL BY HIMSELF for the first time. He is 3.5 years old and my husband tells me this is one of the first big milestones toward playing real hockey (which will finally fulfill WA's longtime obsession). It was such a thrill to see him accomplish this feat. He was beaming as he soaked up the pride that mommy and daddy were oozing, but the real joy was watching him be so proud of himself. His smile was extra big and he gave me the thumbs up as he skated by. That's my boy!:)

Welcome to Ohio!

Last night I had my first all-nighter in a looooong time. It wasn't nearly as fun as the all-nighters of yesteryear because this time I was up with a sick, puking kid. All. Night. Long. WA and IA started a new school on Monday and we have been phasing them in throughout the week, with help from my mother-in-law. So far things seemed to be going well, with IA hoping right in to the mix and WA being a bit more reserved. I think ultimately this new school was a great choice and once WA gets comfortable, he'll do well. The rooms appear very organized, the teachers are tough but kind and they have plenty of daily activities to keep the kids engaged (vs. it being a general free-for-all). The only down side so far, after 3 days, is that WA came home with a raging stomach bug (or maybe the flu?). When I picked him up yesterday he started complaining that his tummy hurt. My mother-in-law and I thought maybe it was his first case of real constipation since his poopies have been "sleeping" (his term, not mine) for a couple of days and he wasn't a complete wet noodle. Turns out he proved us wrong right when we stepped in the front door of our new house and proceeded to vomit all over the foyer (and me!). So we hunkered down for what ended up being a long night. He made it through and seems to be doing much better today. At the moment he's happily watching Charlie Brown's Christmas and dreaming of Santa's motherload.

I know this won't be the last night I spend nursing a sick kid, and I feel surprisingly good myself (however talk to me in 3 hours...), but I certainly hope this is not the way Ohio is gonna treat us, cause dang buckeye that just ain't kind!

WA's first joke

As told to me last night at dinner....

WA: "Mommy, what do you do if a gorrilla is in your seat?"
NA: "I dunno, what?"
WA: "You sit somewhere else."

He, and his oh-so-dry sense of humor, cracked himself up...which in turn cracked up IA, which just added more fuel to his fire. More and more each day he takes after my dad. Lord help me!

School pics

This morning, as I got WA dressed for school, there was extra added pressure. Today is school picture day. I ended up picking out some khaki pants, a white collared shirt and a blue pull over sweater thinking this is as good as it was going to get. After slipping on his pants and shirt he looked me straight in the eye and said "But Mommmmm, what about my tie?" Huh? His tie? About a year ago I got him a clip-on bow tie that he's attempted to wear once, with disasterous results. I put it away, defeated, assuming that it would stay in the drawer from here on out. That is until it came out of left field today! Naturally I didn't fight his request, pulled out the tie and clipped that sucker right on. He looked adorable and I had a good laugh. The tie was still on when I dropped him off this morning, but we'll see what state he ends up in the pictures.

Daycare vent

Recently I've become pretty agitated with our daycare. As I've mentioned before, I'm a huge fan of daycare, my kids have both gotten so much out of it and we've meet some wonderful teachers along the way. I know it's not perfect, and I know that I willingly CHOOSE to put my children in this environment, but I at least want to feel like a consistent effort is being made...and I'm not getting that so much these days.

IA just transitioned in to a room where some of her teachers seem to be putting in the hours vs. really caring about what happens to the kids. They are incredibly passive and sometimes I feel, when we are in conversation, that I am talking right through them. I get it. It's a job. But as a parent when you encounter this laissez faire attitude it's definitely frustrating. IA has come home with more diaper rashes than I care to count (we just recently battled a SEVERE one that I hope to never see the likes of again). Even when I ask them to take a bit of extra care and maybe change her more times than normal...it doesn't seem to happen. I'm not a demanding parent and when I make requests they are not trivial to me. So I say, step it up people!

WA's daycare experience is one hot mess at the moment. He's having some issues in the classroom and I was led to believe, by the main teacher, that they were severe and that he was one of a few, if not the only, child exhibiting these particular behaviors. I come to find out, from other teachers and parents, that while WA is being more rowdy than perhaps a typical 3 year old, that other boys in the class are doing the exact same thing! I am all for correcting this behavior, but I don't think merely politely speaking to a child is always the best way to enforce discipline. Sometimes there needs to be more dramatic consequences..no gym, no books, no playground, etc. I am frustrated that they worked me up in to a tizzy thinking I had a really big problem on my hands. It had me questioning if I was parenting WA the right way at the moment! To be put in a situation that causes you to doubt what you are doing really sucks. Especially when it may not be merited. I am all for correcting the behavior that WA is exhibiting, trust me. I just don't want to be made to feel like I have a juvenile delinquent on my hands! I spoke to my brother the other day and he was extremely reassuring, not only in my parenting skills, but also that ALL 3 year olds go through phases and exhibit "bad" behavior in some way or another. Turns out WA's cousin showed some of the very same stubbornness and acting out that WA does. So now I feel much more confident that we are in a phase that needs consistent guidance (that we have been providing all along). He's a good kid and no one will ever make me feel otherwise again.

So daycare...not on the top of my favorites list this month. Hopefully given time and communication (and some deep breaths on my side) things will get better.

End of rant:).

Lightening McQueen explosion

As I mentioned in my last post, WA spent last week with his grandparents. Now, let me caveat this post by saying...I'm all for grandparents spoiling the heck out of their grand kids, but I have never really been on the parental side of such monumental spoiling before. Sure, Christmases and birthdays are a bit crazy, but never like this. WA came home and it's like Lightening McQueen exploded all over our house. He's everywhere...on t-shirts, cups, plates, place mats and, of coarse, every single Lightening McQueen related matchbox car you can imagine. Wow. What just happened? Hey, my in-laws paid their dues with my husband and his sister, and they deserve to enjoy and spoil their grand kids, but they definitely threw me in to a Lightening McQueen state of shock:).

Pure gold

WA and my hubby spent last week in Ohio. WA was with his grandparents, while the hubby did some work stuff in Columbus. IA and I stayed home. It was a long (and very quiet) week. I am grateful that I didn't have to handle two kids on my own (thank you in-laws!), but I certainly did miss my boys something fierce. WA and the hubby came home late Sunday night. IA was well in to her slumber, as was I to be honest, so the hubby put WA to bed which means that we didn't see him until the next morning. IA and I got up bright and early...as always...and, since he was so tired, it was a while before WA arose. When he did, he called to me from the top of the stairs and greeted me with a big smile and a "Mama!". Check plus kid. He then came downstairs and the moment his sister saw him she BOOKED it across the room, pulled herself up on to WA and gave him a big hug. Ok, that was cute, but what really killed me was WA proceeded to sit down, open his arms and give his sister a huge bear hug back. IA thought this was awesome and began to squeal with glee. Pure parenting gold folks. Pure gold.